Tuesday, May 3, 2011

back to reality

It's official: Summer is HERE! Well...almost. Technically I am two exams away from summer, but today I water skied for the first time this 2011 year, so...yes. It is summer.
I must follow that statement with another that is (sadly) just as true: It is exam time. I could not be more serious when I say that it is truly unfortunate that these two are currently overlapping in my life.
And as exam time arrives, so does stress. And relief, oddly enough. And, for me, a deviation from any kind of regular schedule. I woke up this morning feeling like I hadn't had a really good moment with Jesus in a while. I've been so distracted with finals and portfolios and wrapping up my junior year (oh.my.gosh.) that I've failed to just sit and spend some quality time with Him. You know how you feel when there's this really great friend you have and you love them so much and have the best time when you're with them, but suddenly you're so busy and they keep asking you to hang out but you keep having to say no and you feel terrible because you miss them and you know they miss you and...you know? That's how I feel right now. I feel terrible. Both because I'm better when I'm with Him and because I feel guilty. Bad combination, those two.
But, here's the great part: Jesus misses us when we don't spend time with Him, but He doesn't hold grudges when we don't. He doesn't call off the friendship because we've been a sucky friend. He is still there, still so excited to spend time with us when we finally decide to make the time. This is not an excuse to put God as a last priority just because we know He'll still love us; you don't ignore friends and not feel bad just because you know they'll still love you in the end, and God is no different. It's just a reassurance, really, that God is ready to pick back up right where you left off no matter how shady you've been. Thank God for that, literally.

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